CCI COMMERCIAL CONSTRUCTION
Chris Caputo
PRESIDENT
* Invented the 3rd inch on the tape measure.
* Won the Strong Man competition 37 years in a row.
* Single handedly responsible for the thing that makes Bluetooth work “you're welcome”
* Master of all things cool.
Jack White
FOUNDER
*Once caught a fish, inside a shark, wrapped up by an octopus, with a homemade lure.
* Invented the wheel... and fire.
*19 time Medal of Honor recipient.
* Allergic to rattle snake bites.
Amy Lichtenberg
CONTROLLER
* Invented the sports crowd wave.
*Recently won Strong Man competition, beating 37X champ.
*Designed stealth camouflage for Areas 49, 50 and 51.
*Coined the phrase, "Slug Bug." as part of anger management course.
Troy Derrick
SUPERINTENDENT
* Invented the frayed knot.
* Taught spiders how to hold their breath under water.
* Have been used as a Kevin Costner look alike.
* Best ceiling man on this side of the Rio Grande.
Justin Cox
SUPERINTENDENT
* Once caught a 2 headed 5lb bass
* Offer him a Bud Light at your own risk.
* Is the only undefeated Arm Wrestling Champion.
* Don't ask him how to spell his name
Jose Mancillas
LIGHTING SUPERINTENDENT
* Believes red lights, stop signs and speed limits are just suggestions.
* Speaks 32 languages and a little Spanish.
* Won $1 Mil in Vegas and blew it on pillow products in one weekend.
*Inspired Diego in Dora the Explorer
Dorian Caputo
ESTIMATOR
* Once beat Chuck Norris in a game of pickleball.
* Assigns everyone a secret handshake because robots.
* Recently recovered from a 3 year case of Priapism.
* Identifies as an Aardvark.
Antonio
ASSISTANT
* Master Plumber
* Master Electrician
* Master Carpenter
* Philosopher
Luke Beaver
ESTIMATOR
* Lost pinky toe in bingo accident.
* President of Mullet and Stretchy Jeans club.
* Banned from Bed Bath and Beyond for repeating "It puts the lotion in the basket."
* Cows follow him around. Don't ask.
Jenifer Crenshaw
SOCIAL MEDIA / MARKETING
* Wrote the sequel to Webster's Dictionary.
* Telepathically communicates with animals.
* Graduated Cum Laude from Hogwarts.
* Possibly a jedi knight.
Pat LaRose
SNR PROJECT MANAGER
* 5 x National Champion of Midget Horse Barrel Racing
* 4th degree Quack-Foo blackbelt
* Professional "huh?" asker
* Platinum medal winner in Competitive Slalom Downhill Rowboat Racing.
BEASTY
PROMOTIONS
* Samuel L Jackson wishes he had one.
* Turned down a starring role in The Fast and Furious because the other cars were not fast or furious enough.
* Your mom was in the backseat.
* Comes equipped with rocket launcher and seat ejection.
Hoss
MASCOT
* Taught Lassie how to "come home."
* Originally cast in Men In Black, but was fired due to artistic differences.
* Invented the word "Zoinks" which was stolen by Scooby Doo... lawsuit pending.
* Brags about once having sniffed the butt of a squatting Kardashian.
Tater
GREETER
* Can pee his name in the snow in one, steady stream.
* Once bit a man's arm off then tried to get him to play fetch with it.
* His previous owner was John Wick.
* Can eat a 30 pound turkey in under 20 seconds.